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A Recession Courtship

December 21st, 2011 by admin

Wazzer’s unexpected date takes place at the most cutting-edge beer house in town. The middle-aged hipster, Ram, buys her a handle of stout. Not the most lavish date, but by choosing this beer house, he shows that he’s rich in social currency. Wazzer gets introduced to some of his friends who “just happen” to be there, and they munch a sample of organic caramelized hazelnuts that one of said friends is promoting as a new beer accompaniment.

After a day of being jolly to holiday lunchers, Wazzer is happy, for once, to let this guy talk. “I’m a project manager. Which, in the recession, is terrifying. Everyone’s been at their jobs too long – we’re all stagnating, but there’s nothing to go to. They did layoffs at my Ministry and I asked them to do me in, but they refused.”

“Yeah? Lucky for me, folks still eat and drink, mate.”

“Bloody brilliant!” He lifts his own stein to her. “My boy’s got it in his head that he wants to work at Weta doing digital animation. By the time he’s ready it will probably all be just read from Peter Jackson’s brain waves. Have you heard about the crazed Hobbit tourists? Weta told them not to come, but they’re coming anyway, and doing a documentary? I thought Mormons were supposed to do good works, not nonsense like that. I was an extra the first time around. One of the Gondorians. It was before I went bald,” he says, ruefully running a hand over his head.

Wazzer laughs and shares her 48 Hour Film Festival experience with him. He laughs, too, then says, “What are you doing for New Year’s? Anything planned? Going to have a barbecue on the balcony at my place. Fancy a snarler?”

Wazzer’s used to being bought favorable-exchange-rate dinners by her nomadic pick-ups. But she’s also used to them not getting her Kiwi jokes. “Do ya do them with the onions?”

“With the onions done all nice and soft on the barbecue griddle, with little brown bits. But not black bits. That’s when you’ve gone too far.”

“I like a man who stands for what he believes in,” Wazzer murmurs.


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